Here is a point of view.
Most bloggers seem to have no quarrels with god or religion as such. they wish to give their children a God.Here are some benefits of having one.
- lends more meaning and purpose to life- that you are not an accident or a mistake but the all knowing one has chosen to make you.
- keeps one level headed in the highs and lows that life presents.
- helps digest the inexplicables and the unavoidables.
- even if the faith is not periodically nourished (with rituals) and is left dormant, it rejuvenates itself to firefight in times of crises.(God forbid!) why not keep the firefighting equipments in ready state?
Let's call the faith in a creator, your bond to Him etc the abstract , the essence: the rituals, observances, celebrations, the overt manifestations -- the concrete. or the software and the hardware!
- the basic premise is the two are complementary, not inimical. It is not either or or more of one, less of the other.
- Like in all spheres we proceed from the concrete to the abstract, it is easy and effective to begin with a cheerful, child friendly God, a pot bellied, elephant trunked Ganesha, a Krishna , whatever form prevalent in the family: applauding the little one with a 'good girl' for what is right and 'no, good girls don't do that' when wrong. (I am thinking of Lakhmi's little V). 'Swami manasukkulla irrukku'... Lakshmi, you very well know 'manasu' is not a ready to use free gift that comes with the child at birth, but a structure built over the years with inputs from all around.
- why God? Someone somewhere had said, even if there was no God, it wld be wise to create one. True, faith in God cld easily be used as the pivotal pole around which to firmly string the various virtues we wish to teach, instead of being left loose to get blown away with the first wind.
- Once someone said to Gandhiji that he found it difficult to accept a meat eating Rama. (the Guhan episode) Gandhiji's answer was,'create your own Rama ' one who doesn't eat meat! You may not appreciate a God that gets blinded by fury and throws around curses only to repent and soften them later, Gods that are jealous, fight etc. Numerous stories have been spun around Gods through the ages by people with different aptitudes that may not match yours, to highlight some point. We needn't be bothered by those. We can customise our God!
- Faith in God alright, but why the paraphernalia?
- they are the floats you need to begin swimming with.
- the concrete to peg the abstract,
-the container that holds the perfume, without which it wld soon be gone. - happy childhood associations with God, the goodies, the new clothes, the happy get togethers, gifts, colors, music, rangolis, decorations--lead to a happy association with God.
- as the child grows and matures, the floats will be put aside, the ground wheels taken off, the rockets fired off in stages! Rest assure yr. child is smart, he will grow to know the chaff from the grain just as you did.
- Just bec. you have attained a phd. yr. child can't begin at that level. he has to start from the alphabets all over again. maybe your superior kn. will help him go up faster. bec. you have a 'manasukkulla swami', can't transport it. she has to begin from 'pullaiar ummachhi'.
- If you abstain from influencing yr. child, somebody else will-- and it may not be to yr. liking..nature abhors vacuum. (a common argument, 'let them grow up and make their own choices')
- Is it necessary to wear poonool, mangal sutra?-- follow what you can, when you can. why deride them. If we question each of the things we do in the course of the day, hardly anything will pass the test.
- what of people who are ritualistic but harbour vices--- the two don't share a cause- effect link. they are not vice bec. they follow rituals. may be they wld have been worse w/o them! anyway they are keeping the structure intact: the spirit may inhabit it someday.
And finally, forget all this. yr. influence is much smaller than what you think. expect the unexpected; if you are lucky, surprises, not shocks!
Some one wiser may take it further.
14 comments:
A very interesting, mind-thought out viewpoint. I truly enjoyed reading it.
I came here from the link in Noon's comment section. Your points are excellent and very sensible in my opinion ! As Tharini has said, I also enjoyed reading this post a lot.
forgot to add...the analogies that you have given are very good..makes it so much easier to grasp the underlying idea.
tharini, ranjini: glad you liked it. I was afraid it was getting too authoritative and didactic. the subject chooses the tone, right? (the buck passed!)
Okay...having said that...what IS your own faith about? Where does your heart stand in all of this?
Nice one.
the best point is that we think we influence the kid.. we do a fraction.
we have three kids in our house.. we all have a basic premise of faith, religion, structure.. we all bend it to suit who we have become..
:)
think it is time for you to stop standing by and get back to putting thoughts like this out on a regular basis!
:)
I liked your post, esp the bit about happy childhood associations. And I agree as they grow older they will challenge which is always good.
@Tharini My take is -- why have a take? leave it to the experts.
And then, our belief system is organic-- it grows, evolves, so there is no 'one' take, right? Even within a short period of time, it swings from one extreme to the other e.g. our state of mind before a crucial event and after. Don't we invoke all known gods and pledge anything that comes to our mind, our faith level is so high, but after the results say, ' didn't I over react, I had done well, wld have got admission anyway, did I promise too much?'
Theology says God made man in His image and sociology says man made God in his! I think the two are not contradictory and there is truth in both. The various forms given to God, the attributes, the anecdotes are sure our creation and hence optional. It appears reasonable that Ram, Krishna et all must have been small time rulers enlarged beyond recognition by the poets and the faithfuls over the ages. We can take the useful lessons and leave the rest.
At the practical level, w/o actually making a flow chart ( I am aware of some very popular flowcharts doing the rounds), let's begin with,
Can we verify the existence or otherwise of a God?
dedicated search engines have been trying to do so over the millennia, are still doing, and will continue in the future .so until the results are declared, to qn.2
Do we need a God?
If no, march ahead, you have plenty of company. Only, I can't say, God bless you. Bless yourself!
If yes, (for the reasons mentioned and for many more. e.g. we have a psychological need for a higher entity to identify with, an ideal to strive for, be proud to belong to. Human beings, however exceptional, invariably disappoint us. (we can bask in the reflected glory of the winning cricket team, but for how long?) So many of our childhood ideals have shown us their seamy side. With God, the qn doesn't arise;
In times of calamities we can pour our hearts out to Him w/o inhibitions, assured of a 100% safe and free audience ( and save of the psychiatrist's fee)
Having decided to admit God in yr. life, what next? Although we start with a form, names, we can always lay greater stress on the qualities, even from the very beginning. Pass on to our children not a fossilized God, but one who grows with them.
Must have bored you. We are all still evolving, aren't we? And no one has all the answers.
@ Sunder
Thanks. I had mentioned the Avathara rahasyam of the blog in the other post. But the immediate karanam was Noon's post on the topic, and earlier, Laksmi's. By the way, it is a one way talk with Lakshmi, she doesn't even know I am talking to her! I understand one is supposed to dress up, knock at the door and take a gate pass, before getting even limited access to her place. It does not suit me in my avatar as a bystander; don't wish to leave too many trails. Will wait for her to find her way here.. It's a small world, isn't it?
And for your suggestion, thanks, but no motivation for the present.
@ Squiggles Mom Thanks. You are lucky you sound so ready to face the challenge!
leave it to the experts
Who, are the experts? theologians? Historians? Saints?
You have rationalised it all very well. But God is defnitely not as complex as it sounds here. Forget theology, forget sociology, you are not going to get any answers there. Look inside your heart. Only place. Its is the simple virtues like kindness, generosity of spirit, love and welfare of humankind, that God is about. Nothing else. I am no expert. But I am convinced. I don't know the answer for everything, but I know I'm in the right place for it.
Yes, we do need a God. For precisely all those reasons you mentioned and more. Much much more.
All said and done, to each...his very own and good luck with it. And from my side...I can say...god bless you. :)
The idea that caught my fancy the most was that we are 'designer products'; carefully designed and executed by the Master Designer and His team of able craftsmen!
In handloom products for export, there is a note that says something like, 'the irregularities seen in the fabric are not weaving defects but salient features of the fabric.' Yes, the pug nose, the buck teeth, the bald head, the pot belly, the nasty temper are all intricate design elements! just like the strategically placed cuts and slits in the dresses.
Extending the analogy, the trials and pains, the calamities you go thro in life are but stages in the manufacturing process; like acid wash, stone wash, hot press and all that. The more the processes, the more valuable the product!
The difference between you and Ash is just a design number!
How flattering! Now walk around with your head held high.
Only, these 'very exclusive designer products' are produced individually on a MASS SCALE!
I am NOT sorry for restricting access to my thoughts, and more importantly, my family about which I have plenty written at my blog. Have you noticed that that commenting on your blogsite requires a gate pass too?
The"kadavul manasukkulla" argument, is the neutral ground that I can give a child whose mom is a
confused theist and father, a confirmed and practicing aethist. In fact mom herself digs the advaidic philosophy, which borders aethism. So it only seems fair to let the child understand that "God" is a concept that we create in our minds to give the more insecure among us, some sort of mental comfort. And even if you are a theist, "God" is way too magnificent to be treated as a physical entity.
That notwithstanding, my preschool daughter is encouraged to play with stuffed Krishna dolls. I would rather that she plays with Krishna than Barbie.
Lakshmi, It was not a complaint. Just that as a non blogger, I didn't want to register at various places.(hadn't even tried but had seen a lot of complaints @ commenting at vox) felt a bit uncomfortable @ having referred to you w/o informing you. Otherwise I enjoy your posts, your intelligence and sense of humor. Thanks for having made it here.
And thank YOU for spawning a post in vox ! It was long brewing upstairs, and this post catalyzed it.
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